A Shinobi's Vacation
by Brian-chan
Summary: In an attempt to regain the money lost from Tsunade's gambling addiction, she sends some shinobi telling them its a vacation. Little do they know that she is about to make their vacation into a bestselling movie. NaruHina NejiTen InoShika SasSak AsuKur.
1. Tsunade's brilliant plan

**Hi Everyone! I got bored with my other fics and this idea just popped into my head so I just had to write it down. This is my first humor fic, I'm not even sure if I'm funny or not so please be nice.**

**Don't own Naruto. **

**Enjoy!!!**

* * *

Chapter 1- Tsunade's brilliant plan.

Tsunade flung Tonton out the window in frustration.

"SHIZUNE, YOUR FAT PIG ATE ALL MY MONEY!" She yelled/howled/screamed.

"Tsunade-sama, please calm down." Shizune answered calmly.

Her eye twitched.

"SOME OLD SON OF A BITCH GOT YOU DRUNK LAST NIGHT AT THE BAR! YOU GAMBLED AWAY ALL YOUR MONEY! DON'T YOU REMEMBER?? AND NOW, YOU CAN'T PAY OFF KONOHA'S DEBTS, THE SHINOBI, AND…ME!!! PLUS, YOU CAN'T EVEN PAY FOR MY PIGS SURGERY, NOW THAT YOU'VE CHUCKED HIM OUT THE WINDOW!!!" Shizune said panting as she finished shouting.

Tsunade blinked.

"And my pig's not fat!"

Tsunade blinked again.

"Never mind your pig, Shizzy. We need money!"

"Since when do you call me Shizzy? Shizune asked her mentor with a questioning look.

"As of now! So what are we gonna do? What are we gonna do? WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO? Screamed Tsunade as she started shaking Shizune violently.

After a couple minutes of shaking her apprentice, Tsunade released her.

Shizune started spinning around the room dizzily.

"Shizune we don't have time for dancing! Help me think of something!" Said Tsunade Frantically.

Shizune finally stopped spinning.

"Tsunade-sama, we could sell things." She said.

"Great idea!"

Tsunade paused.

"What should we sell?"

"Uhhhhhh."

"AHA! I KNOW!" Tsunade jumped onto her desk. "We could sell your pig!"

This time it was Shizune's turn to blink.

"What the hell? My pig?" Shizune repeated. "Not my pig your ignorant excellency! Something that would be worthwhile!"

"Hmmmm, your right." Said Tsunade agreed.

All of a sudden, Tsunade screamed.

"I got it!

* * *

**Yay, Cliffy. What is Tsunade's brilliant plan? **

**Find out soon. Now I want you all to review. **


	2. Random Momentsand WHAT?

**Hey Everyone!**

**Thanks for reading the first chapter! I have never gotten that many hits in one chapter before!**

**I apologize that the first chapter was so short. But don't worry, the next chapters will be longer.**

**I apologize for the long wait for this chapter. I have been very busy with…other things.**

**Enjoy and review after you read please! If people keep reviewing, I might start dedicating chapter to them!!! SO REVIEW!!!**

**This chapter is dedicated to my very cool friend supershu-chan. I'LL MISS YOU!!**

**I DON'T OWN NARUTO **

* * *

Chapter 2-random moments and…WHAT???

With no missions planned, Shikamaru sat against a tree with a piece of grass in his mouth, staring at the clouds.

"Aaaaah, this is the life." He said as he looked at a cloud that looked exactly like a deer. "Finally I can ju-."

"SHIKAMARU GET YOUR LAZY ASS OVER HERE!"

Shikamaru glanced at where the voice was coming from. There he saw Ino far away, glaring at him and taking large strides toward him. Plus, she did NOT look happy.

"WHAT. DID. YOU. DO. WITH. MY. SPRINGROLLS???!!!??" She screamed at the top of her lungs. Shikamaru just rolled his eyes.

"Women…so troublesome." He muttered. Unfortunately, Ino heard him.

"TROUBLESOME?!? I'LL SHOW YOU TROUBLESOME!!!" Ino said rolling up her sleeves. She started shaking Shikamaru violently.

"NOW TALK! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY SPRING ROLLS?!? I KNOW YOU TOOK THEM! IN FACT, I BET YOU WERE THE ONE WHO TOOK MY TEMPURA YESTERDAY TOO!!!"

Shikamaru just looked at her.

"Why all the greasy foods? I thought you were on a diet because you were complaining about how fat you were." He said. Ino looked like she might strangle him.

"Ok. OK. I'll shut up now."

Ino raised her fist…

CRUNCH

They were suddenly interrupted by a loud munching noise. Ino turned around and Shikamaru looked at where the sound was coming from. There stood Chouji chowing on a bag of potatoe chips.

Ino and Shikamaru stared.

Chouji looked like someone had interrupted his favorite television show.

"No No, go on; keep going as if I wasn't here. This is getting interesting." He said, looking excited and shoving more potato chips into his mouth.

Ino raised her eyebrows. Seeing Chouji eating…

"AHA!!! SO IT WAS YOU!!!!!" Ino yelled pointing a finger at Chouji.

"Huh???"

"DON'T PLAY INNOCENT WITH ME YOU THEIF!"

Chouji gave her a puzzling look.

"CONFESS! YOU ATE MY TEMPURA AND SPRING ROLLS!" She screamed.

"Tempura? Spring Rolls? Where? Where?" Asked Chouji delighting, thinking there was some tasty, greasy, food nearby.

Ino punchede her palm and started cracking her knuckles.

"Whoa, who knew she coujld keep up a rampage this long." Said Shikamaru.

"SHUT UP YOU!" Ino said dangerously. Shikamaru immediately closed his mouth.

Both boys knew they were in trouble this time. Usually, Asuma-sensei would settle everything down when Ino was on one of her common shouting fits. But because there were no missions planned, the chances of Asuma showing up were slim to none.

"Hehe. With Asuma-sensei not here, you boys are gonna get it."

POOF! Asuma appeared in front of them.

"Hey guys."

Shikamaru and Choiji breathed a sigh of relief.

"Dammit." Ino said. "What are you doing here sensei?"

"What? Why can't a guy have a little fun with his prodigies?" Asuma asked his students.

"We're prodigies?" Ino asked raising her eyebrow.

"Whats a prodigy? Chouji asked.

Asuma rolled his eyes. "Never mind. What I came here to tell you is that Tsunade wants you guys and me in her office."

"What? But you said there wouldn't be any missions today." Said Chouji.

"This is all troublesome."

Asuma ignored Shikamaru and Chouji. "Come on. Lets Go." He said.

"But wait." Cried Ino. "I still haven't found out who took my Spring Rolls and Tempura." She said.

"Spring Rolls? Tempura?" Didn't I see you eat your spring rolls today? And you tempura yesterday?" Asuma asked.

Ino looked surprised.

"I did?" The confused Yamanaka asked.

"Yes you did. I asked you for some tempura yesterday and spring rolls today and both times you said NO and that you were going to stuff yourself silly."

"Oh I did." Smiled Ino as her and her sensei began their journey toward the Hokage Mansion.

Chouji turned to Shikamaru.

"Shikamaru, does she enjoy torturing us? Because I think she falsely accused us on purpose."

Shikamaru nodded.

Chouji, I think your right. Yamanaka Ino may have found herself a new hobby."

And the two friends set off together.

………………………………………………………………………………

There Naruto sat slurping up ramen at Ichirakus. When he finished, he thanked the old man and went for a walk. He then stumbled upon Hinata, Kiba, and Shino. They were talking about a very random subject…eyes.

"Hinata, there's this issue that I have been thinking about for some time. How…WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR EYES???!"

Hinata looked a bit insulted…although she tried to hide it.

"W-well Kiba-kun, I-I have t-told you a-already. It's because of o-our b-bloodline. They're white. R-remember?" The shy kunoichi said.

"BUT THEN HOW DO YOU SEE??!?" Raged Kiba.

Shino sighed.

"She can see. Its part of her Bloodline. Get that into your thick skull."

Kiba glared.

"DON'T YOU START TOO. WHAT ABOUT _**YOUR **_EYES? YOU'VE NEVER EVEN SHOWN YOUR EYES IN PUBLIC. FOR ALL WE KNOW YOU MIGHT NOT HAVE ANY EYES! WHAT ARE BEHIND THOSE SMALL ROUND GLASSES OF YOURS?!?"

"That, my dog-smelling friend is none of your business." Shino said coolly.

"WHAT?!? ARE YOU SAYING THAT WE SMELL!?" Kiba shouted. Akamaru gave an angry bark.

Shino wrinkled his nose.

"That…is _**precisely **_what I'm saying." He said pinching his nose.

This was when Naruto decided to intervene.

"Hey guys." He said. "What's cracking?"

"Oh nothing." Said Kiba. "We were just talking about EYES." He said shooting looks at both Hinata and Shino. "Hey Naruto. Don't you think that Hinata's eyes look weird?"

Hinata stopped breathing.

Naruto looked a little puzzled.

"Well." He said slowly. "No, I don't. Actually, I _**like**_ Hinata's eyes. They look cool."

Hinata turned red.

Kiba raised his eyebrows.

"Besides. I like people like Hinata." Finished Naruto.

Hinata fainted.

Kiba looked at Shino, then at Naruto and finally at the fainted Hinata.

"Ummmmm Okay…what just happened? Asked Naruto, obviously confused.

"what just happened…WHAT JUST HAPPENED? HINATA JUST FAINTED THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED!" Kiba screamed. "Besides, why did you side with her? Every knows that I'm the only one in our group with normal, good-looking eyes. Hinata has those white eyes. Shino never SHOWS his eyes, and Kurenai has red eyes. They look downright ugly if you ask me."

"You were saying something?" A dangerous, female voice from behind spoke.

Kiba, Shino, and Naruto whirled around to see Kuranai. She did not look happy.

"What about my eyes?" Kurenai growled.

"Kiba gulped. Shino just stood there, and Naruto started to fan Hinata.

"Well, I didn't really-" Kiba started. In a flash, Kurenai had a kunai at Kiba's throat. Naruto stopped fanning Hinata.

"Say it again I dare you." Said Kurenai putting the kunai closer to Kiba. Akamaru hid behind Shino…who pinched his nose signally that Kiba's dog friend needed a bath.

KIba had a look on his face that read "save me" and Kurenai had him in a genjutsu of, well…fleas.

Kiba had a look of terror on his face before fainting.

Kurenai sighed. She turned to Naruto and Shino. "Hokage-sama has told us all to meet her at the Hokage mansion." She said.

"All? Who's all? Naruto asked.

Kurenai shrugged.

"I was just told to bring my team up there. Naruto, your team's already up there so you can come with me. Now carry those two up to the mansion.

Naruto and Shino obeyed. Shino lifted Kiba onto his shoulders while Naruto carried Hinata bridal-style up to the Hokage mansion.

………………………………………………………………………………

Tenten, Neji, and Lee were at a training ground. Tenten was throwing shuriken at a bunch of targets, Neji was leaning against a tree, and Lee was, well…being Lee.

Neji, I challenge you to a fight!"

"…"

"I challenge you!"

"hm"

"Victory shall be mine!"

"…"

Neji, please accept my challenge!"

"No."

"OK!"

_A couple second later…_

"Neji I challenge you!"

Neji rolled his eyes to the sky in what could only be an expression of "why me?"

Tenten stopped throwing shuriken and laughed at Neji's expression. She jumped onto a tree branch and sat down.

"Now what?" Tenten asked her teammates.

"Well, I suppose we-.."

But Neji was interrupted by a loud yell.

"YAAAAAHHH MAY ETERNAL YOUTH SHINE UPON YOU MY FRIENDS!!!"

Tenten slapped her forehead.

Neji rolled his eyes.

Lee's eyes widened in awe.

Gai had appeared out of nowhere. Spandex and all.

"Come my youthful friends! The Hokage calls for us in her tower! We must go!"

"Yessir!" Lee shouted, saluting.

"Lee!"

"Gai sensei!"

"LEE!"

"GAI SENSEI!"

The two men hugged and started crying waterfalls.

Tenten and Neji looked at them in disgust, as they rolled their eyes for like the millionth time.

"Lets just go already." Muttered Neji as he walked away. Tenten followed.

Lee and Gai let go of each other and followed too.

………………………………………………………………………………

"Where are they?" Muttered Tsunade as she waited for the rest of the people to show up. Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi were already there, along with Anko. Sakura was, as usual, trying to get Sasuke's attention.

"Hey Sasuke."

"Go away."

"Wanna go-"

"Nope"

"Can we-"

"Not interested."

Sakura sighed, admitting defeat…again.

Just then, Asuma and Ino entered through the door. Chouji and Shikamaru were right behind them.

"Hey! What is forehead girl doing here?" Said Ino pointing her finger at Sakura glaring.

"I'll ask you the same thing Ino-PIG!" Sakura shot back.

Shikamaru sighed.

BANG

Naruto had just burst in with Hinata in his arms. Poor Hinata was still unconscious. Shino carrying Kiba, and Kurenai were right behind them.

"YESSS!!!" Shouted Naruto. "Finally a mission! I hope this one will be a test of my skill!"

Sakura raised her eyebrows.

Tsunade shook her head.

Meanwhile, Hinata started to stir within all the excitement. She then realized that there was a smell of ramen on the person holding her. She looked up. Naruto was carrying her! She was in his arms!

Naruto looked down at Hinata.

"Oh, Hinata, your awake."

Hinata fainted.

"ok…" Shino said. He threw Kiba to the floor.

"OUCH! What was that for?" Kiba asked angrily.

"You fainted. I woke you up. Hinata has fainted…again."

"Again?"

"Again."

Shino went over to Hinata and pinched her. She awoke suddenly. She then remembered that she was in Naruto's arms.

She fainted…again.

"wow…just wow." Shikamaru stated. Chouji took out a bag of potato chips and started eating.

Tsunade sighed. "idiots." She muttered.

CRASH

Lee and Gai were here. Followed by Tenten and Neji panting behind. Apparently, it seemed that they were racing.

"Lee. I have won this race. You need to get stronger!" Gai Yelled.

"Yessir" Lee shouted.

"Oh Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

Gai-sensei!"

hug

Tenten and Neji rolled their eyes.

"Bunch of idiots." Tsunade muttered again.

The noise was like an air horn.

Shizune covered her ears.

"SHUT THE HELL UP YOU FOOLS!!!" Screamed Tsunade. Everyone stopped talking and cowered in fear. Even Hinata awoke from the order the Hokage had given them.

"There that's better." Tsunade said. Then she got serious. "Alright because you people here have done such a great job lately, I want you to take a break from this ninja life and just take a vacation. A ship is going to take you to an island of paradise tomorrow at 10AM sharp. You are not to leave the island or you risk getting kicked out of the village. Any questions??"

Everyone stared blankly at her…

"WHAT??!?" Everyone shouted.

"Whoa. Granny Tsunade is being nice! Who knew she had it in her?" Naruto said.

Tsunade twitched.

CRASH

Tsunade had flung Naruto out the window with her super-human strength, breaking the glass.

"I'm SORRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY" Naruto yelled, his voice growing fainter and fainter. Finally there was a loud Bang, telling everyone that Naruto had hit the ground.

"Well then, any questions?" Tsunade asked.

Everyone stared blankly, obviously shocked.

"Well then, everyone is dismissed. Get packed and I'll meet you at the docks tomorrow." Tsunade said.

Everyone still stood there and stared blankly.

Tsunade twitched.

"EVERYONE GET OUT OF HERE!!!!" She screamed.

Everyone left in a blink of an eye.

**

* * *

**

**What exactly is Tsunade planning? Will Hinata ever stop fainting? Will Sakura ever get Sasuke to pay attention to her? **

**Well, that was quite long. Again I apologize for the long wait. Please review. Whoever reviews for the second chapter I will dedicate the third chapter to them! **

**Find out in the next chapter!**

**Ta-Ta for now!**


	3. A Bad Surprise, Horrible Roommates!

**I'M BAAACK!!!**

**Thanks for the reviews! **

**This chapter is dedicated to the following people who reviewed:**

migrated-pineapple

coffee bean-the panda

queenbee12345

Purplewolfstar35

InoXShikamaru4ever

white eyed fox

Chocochip Hakura

Minato Namikaze999

Superchu-chan

**To everyone, thank you so much for the reviews!!!**

**I DON'T OWN NARUTO!**

**ON WITH THE STORY!!!**

* * *

**Chapter 3- A Bad surprise, Horrible roommates!**

Sakura awoke, and realized what time it was. It was already 9:45!

The female kunoichi bolted out of bed, slipped on some clothes, grabbed her backback, and bolted out the door, saying a quick goodbye to her mom as she left.

When she got to the docks, everyone was already there.

"Oi, Sakura-chan!" Naruto shouted as he waved to her. "How come you late? Your never late! Even Kakashi-sensei got here before you!"

A vein popped on Sakura's forehead. She chucked her bag at Naruto.

BONK!

"owwwwww…" Naruto said clutching his forehead, as he fell on the ground groaning in pain.

Chouji, Shikamaru, and Kiba sweatdropped.

"Boy , is that women scary." Said Kiba.

"Kinda reminds me of Ino." Shikamaru said. Chouji nodded.

Sasuke heard this, frowned and walked away.

Ino and Tenten were chattering about the usual things: fashion clothing ect. Hinata was shyly listening to them.

Shino was just leaning against a nearby tree, with his hands in the pockets of his jacket.

Lee, Gai, Neji and Kakashi were talking to each other, but it mostly sounded as Lee and Gai challenging Neji and Kakashi to contests, and Neji and Kakashi just kept sweat dropping at each challenge.

Asuma Anko, and Kurenai were just standing there, talking.

And finally, Tsunade showed up.

"EVERYONE SHUT UP!" Tsunade screamed.

Silence immediately filled the air.

"Thanks you." Tsunade said as she smiled. "Now, I want everyone to meet on the main deck where we'll discuss everything else."

The group, still scared that their Hokage would blow up, obeyed.

When the group got onto the main deck, Tsunade spoke.

"Alright. Everyone has been assigned to their rooms. All the girls share, and the guys, well, you'll find out soon enough. Well, everyone have fun! I'll see you all in a month." And with that she left. Everyone's eyes darted from Tsunade leaving to the paper on the floor with the list of people sharing rooms.

This is what it said:

Room 1: Shino Kiba Naruto

Room 2: Couji Shikamaru

Room 3: Sasuke Lee Neji

Room 4: Kakashi Gai

Room 5: Asuma

Room 6: Kurenai Anko

Room 7: Tenten Ino Sakura Hinata

Everyone stared at the lists. About half the people groaned.

"Crap." Said Sasuke glaring at Neji. Neji groaned and glared back at the fellow doujutsu user.

"Shit." Said Shino. "Why do I have to be stuck with two morons." He said under his breath.

"WHOO-HOO!" Shouted Kiba as he and Naruto high-fived each other.

"Why me?" Moaned Kakshi while Gai lept for joy.

Shikamaru just yawned, while Chouji munched on a bag of chips.

Asuma, Kurenai and Anko just shrugged.

The four girls were happy…almost.

Sakura and Ino were staring each other down, while Tenten and Hinata tried to separate them.

Shizune suddenly appeared.

"Alright everyone! Get into you rooms. You will be leaving shortly." She shouted. And with that, she disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

Everyone started to move towards their rooms. All except Sasuke and Neji that is.

Both had their bloodlines on, staring each other down.

"Boy, Tsunade made a big mistake putting those two together." Kiba whispered to Naruto.

"Why's that?" Naruto asked.

Kiba smiled.

"Well, lets just say you never know what might happen when two pretty boys share a room together."

Naruto grinned.

_Elsewhere…_

Tsunade and Shizune were sitting with a hooded figure in a tea shop.

"Is everything ready?" Tsunade asked.

The figure nodded.

"Yes all the cameras have been set in place."

Tsunade smiled evily.

"Excellent. Good good. I still want you to follow them though, with your ability, you should be able to hide from even the great Kakashi. Bring a video camera with you too. Make sure everything goes well.

"Yes Madame." The hooded man said as he disappeared in a poof of smoke.

"Good." Tsunade said. "If all goes well Shizzy, we shall be swimming in moola very soon.

Shizune nodded.

"Now Shizzy, GET MY SAKE!"

* * *

**Who is this hooded figure? What does he have in store for Naruto and his gang? Find out in the next chapter!**

**Please review! If you review, I'll dedicate the chapter to you! Thanks!**


	4. A Heart Broken

**Hey everyone!**

**This chapter is dedicated to the following people who reviewed:**

Darkheart O.

Minato Namikaze999

Sadiegrl

Migrated-pineapple

InoXShikamaru4ever

**Thanks so much people!!**

**Again, I don't own Naruto.**

**Enjoy!!**

* * *

Chapter 4-A Heart Broken!

Naruto and the others watched Tsunade and Shizune wave to them as the ship left the dock. Their beloved village was getting smaller and smaller as they traveled, until it couldn't be seen at all.

"Alright, I'm going to get something to eat. I'm hungry." Chouji said as he left the front deck. Shikamaru shrugged and followed.

"Mhn" Sasuke said as he left. He was obviously going for a walk. Alone.

Tenten stood up.

"Well I'm going inside. Care to join me? Hinata? Sakura? Ino?" Hinata and Ino follwed. But Sakura walked away.

"I'll be right there. Give me 10 minutes." She said. Tenten nodded and left with the other two girls.

"Hey, is it just me or did Sakura just go in the same direction as Sasuke went? Kiba asked Naruto.

Naruto blinked. "Huh?"

"Idiot." Neji muttered and left.

Shino left soon after. It was now just Lee, Kiba, and Naruto on the front deck.

"Hey…Wheres Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto wondered aloud. None of the jounin accompanying them on the trip could be seen.

"I'm off to find Gai-sensei!!" Lee shouted enthusiastically as he took off.

Kiba raised his eyebrows. He then turned to Naruto. "Lets just go to our room and…do…something..." He said. Akamaru barked in agreement.

So Naruto, Kiba, and Akamaru left.

Meanwhile, Sakura was you guessed it…following Sasuke.

Sasuke noticed her presence and turned around to face her.

"What do you want?" He asked her.

Sakura said nothing. But her cheeks started to turn red.

"Why do you keep following me? Go away!"

Sakura just looked at him and blushed.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. Suddenly, Sharingan appeared where his eyes used to be.

"I've had it with you!" He yelled. "I don't understand why you can't just leave me alone!! You know I'm not going to go out with you! I have my own goals to achieve. And dating some blushing Fangirl isn't one of them!!"

Sakura froze. Her eyes widened, obviously shocked and taken aback, Sasuke had never yelled like that to her before.

Sasuke then turned off his sharingan and walked away, leaving the stunned Sakura alone.

Sakura just stood there, shocked. Tears started to fall from her eyes…

_Elsewhere…_

Ino, Hinata, and Tenten were in their rooms doing girl things. They were sitting on their beds, having a good time.

"H-Hey, its been a while and Sakura still isn't back yet" Hinata said.

"Yeah that's strange. It's not like Sakura to be out this late." Ino said. Tenten nodded.

"Let's go look for her. She can't have gotten far. We're on a ship for kunai's sake." She said.

Tenten and Hinata got up to leave the room.

"Coming Ino?" Hinata asked.

"Yeah I'll be right there." Ino said.

"Ino stared at the ground. "Where are you Sakura? What's happened?" She asked herself as she left and closed the door behind her.

* * *

**Uh-oh. Poor Sakura. Will she ever recover from what has just transpired? Find out in the next chapter!**

**  
Sorry for this chapter not being as funny or long as the others. And, no one flame me for what I did to Sakura please! I don't hate her, I just…well…you'll find out in the next couple of chapters. **

**Please review!**


End file.
